I wish he was a professor of mine, any subject would do.

He actually is a fashion designer.

Sitting on my family sofa with my netbook in my lap trying to figure out how to start a blog and actually be committed to it, I wait for my creativity to flow. Perhaps I should write something about myself, I am just your average person. I am not special, I live life just because I am alive… But recently life has not been very… usual. I started at my first job in January, I am a community college student, I have been searching since I was 15. Back then,  I knew who I wanted to be,  I knew what type of employee I was going to be; the hard working one, that does everything their employer asks of them and more. I often get to the point where they don’t even have to ask anymore. I set that standard for my life early in my teen years.

But the working career is not what I hoped it would be.

Working at this job has certainly been anything but a professional experience. When I started,  I knew exactly nothing on how to be an employee, I was very… Newb.

I was first of the bunch they had hired this year. The only reason I think they hired me could be perhaps I had no experience what-so-ever and I was a decently attractive female. See, the place I work at is geared towards the male, but I am just a cashier, a low-key maintenance job with very little exertion and/or intelligence needed, kinda like a McDonald’s employee, the only worthy job is management.

Don’t begin to try to analyze me, I am very grateful and lucky to have this job, I just know I can do much better with my choice of career or in-between jobs, and I will. Why else have I been working very hard to get out of my… environment?

See, I was home schooled as a child, which is a very, very intelligent choice  for your kid, if you are a committed, organized, decently educated parent who has structure and discipline. My parents never had that, well, my mom had the education down. Besides, they did it for quite a selfish reason, in my opinion: so that I wouldn’t become “worldly.” They did not want that, they underestimated me.

My parental unites are… Religious.

For the sake of anonymousness, safety of my identity and affiliations, I shall remain as little-detail orientated as much as I can. Truly, details aren’t really important for the story, the only purpose of any story is that it should tell what happened, not what one was watching while it was happening, and certainly not the name of my job.

So, I shall refrain from any sort of category besides the ones I simply state. One being this, I am a nerd.

I have nothing against religion, actually, that is a lie. I have everything against religion, but, again, before you try to label me, I am quite non-atheist as well.

You see, religion is what prevented my parents from letting me kick-ass in high school, religion is what prevented me from learning evolution, other religions, from studying philosophy, from being my own identity and person for 18 years. Those years where you create who you are, set yourself aside from everyone else, to think thoughts without feeling you will be punished by being sent to the eternal flames of hell. Scared all those years… to be who I am.

I could go on about how religious hindered my life, but the thing is, religion has hindered everyone’s life in some way, either by their choice or someone else’s. Religion affects choice, if one is religious, their choices will be affected by something other than their selves, which may lean towards the favor of religion. I state this because I have a great example.

Proposition 8.

Whose choice is affecting LGBT human beings from being married?

Your’s, who is most likely a Christian based on statistics.

Anyways,  there is nothing wrong with affiliations, beliefs, or traditions, unless of course, you push it upon another forcibly or even rudely.

Another great example, I was chatting with classmates in the cafeteria simply debating how “straight-edge” people become so not “straight-edge.” Of course religion picks up in the conversation, mutual non-believers agreeing with the hinderances of religion, polite, quiet, and not trying to offend the fellow classmate who was eavesdropping at the table over. My classmate asks me if I was a Christian, the eavesdropper loudly exclaims “You are certainly not a Christian.” It isn’t bad to not be a Christian, but the way she said it made me feel like I was a horrible being and not worthy to even state my afilliation.

At that time I think I blacked out, I think from what I can recall, I really ranted at the young and extremely rude person who made a slight assumption about me based on my actions. She didn’t say much after that. I don’t recall what I said to her but I can garauntee it was full of logic, along the lines of “I am more Christian than you are by the facts that I didn’t rudely assume something bad about a stranger and tried to make you, the eavesdropper, feel bad at all for interrupting me.”

I swear, there are only some things I like about humanity.

So, this average person doesn’t blog about how much she hates religion, just the people. Yeah its the person who is still doing the choosing, but again, religious people fail to see that, they think there is a higher source guiding them, failing to take responsibility for their actions. “God allowed me to eavesdrop so I can point out your faults!.” >:< MMm!

… Hehe, maybe not that extreme, but you get the idea.

Well, my parents aren’t all bad, that is why I again state how average I am, I don’t have excruciating anger towards my parents, just a tad remorseful that I didn’t get to go to a public high school and guide a different teen-life.

I also know my parents are not unique, everyone’s parents, I mean everyone’s, can be a very big disappointment for their children in different ways, the only connection is disappointment.

Mmm… Writer’s block is quite delicious.

Well, let’s get back to my job, I suppose.

I was hired as part-time… with 40 hours my first week. Oh yeah. My job is one of the big corporation retail stores that everyone can recognize their logo for, or should. I have had customers forget exactly where they were. Oops, I said retail, thats pretty anonymous right? I mean, I don’t think I would be complaining about my job if it were anything else but the usual. Usual meaning retail, beverage, and food. That is pretty usual, unless it was a Humanese restaurant. Now that I could start a blog on just to describe the customers for.

Think, what kind of person eats humanese? I know about it because, as an average person, my family can be kind of eccentric. It was my mom’s idea. I like humanese now.

Here it is again, that sweet, sweet writer’s block.

I’ll shed more light on my education, since it is basically all I can account for my accomplishments.

I may be an average person, but I like to think my education is above so. I went straight to community college after I had my personal and unique “graduation.” Oh the one graduating class of 08′, with only one graduate. I was never much of a spirited person.

Since then my G.P.A. has been teetering between 3.44 and 3.79. I like learning.

I think I like to learn because I was shocked with a truthful mythical fear, humans only use 10% of their brain. What? Ten Percent? Oh how I wish I could say I was not a human being…

I strive for at least 15% a day. My goal is 100%.

I don’t miss high school, I am quite glad it is over actually. It was all business for me after high school. Education was my number one priority.

So I took all my hard classes first, but I still had no clue who or what I wanted to be. I was very impressionable, but just walking through life, waiting for it all to end.

I took a philosophy class my first semester actually. Don’t doubt it when I say it was my favourite class. It taught me how to think, not “what” to think. Some people can’t grasp that… Like my parents after I told them I denounced my religion two months into the class.

They refused to accept it. They acted as if I had died a horrible death and they would never see my body again… She actually told me she wished I was pregnant… at age 18.

I don’t know if you have done what I did, or what your position is on what I did, but I don’t think you could understand unless you knew what it felt like to cause the ultimate disappointment to your parents.

Yes, the ultimate.

They didn’t care I had sex.

They wouldn’t care if I did drugs.

They wouldn’t care if I went to jail.

Murdered someone,

or married the Anti-Christ,

they only cared about my ticket to Heaven.

Which is not a proven place.

Good thing I haven’t been to jail or murdered anyone.

I am definitely staying away from dangerous drugs. I may do a certain kind that is known to not cause overdose and perhaps even kill bacteria, even the known MRSA superbug, but I am smart, sorry, I know what to use and not use. So again, my average character is saved by the fact this blog is not about promoting the safest drugs ever.

But from this post already you can determine and gather information about me.

1. A young lady

2. Educated

3. A writer

Yes, I write, I love writing. I love the way I can form sentences to help the reader understand exactly what I am trying to get across to them. I like to think it is a form of art.

Writing and photography of course, so this blog will also contain pictures that are copy written by myself through deviant art.

With the word count at 1690 with this exact sentence, I shall come to an end.

I will post something, an insight, a rant, an angst, or anything every day until the end of this year. If I can’t commit to this then, then I know I am not a blogger.

Here is a picture for the day:

Taken momentarily from stepping outside.